Promises, Promises

In the light of the stars, a romantic is born. In the light of day, our hearts are torn.
In the sorrows of night, God reaches in. He whispers to us, “I know you within.” To be touched and loved is not a promise of this land. Only some will feel love, both from heart and hand.
I will pray for the wind to take my wishes away. I may be loved but it will not be in this way.  ~Angie

Sometimes it is in how we expect life to be that we are the most injured. Embracing life does not require all our beautiful wishes to come true. It is about seeing past the fog and taking in what is right and pure. Life is not a promise, but there is promise in life. Whether it is a flower we pass every day, the ability to escape to nature’s getaways, the smile of a child or the hug of a friend… We truly are blessed. One day at a time.

Let’s Be Honest

We tend to think that to be an honest person, we must air all our laundry out to everyone. This is not true! ‘Everyone’ is not going to respect your ‘everything’ ‘every time’. I found this out the hard way.

Being a transparent person by nature, I tend to put a little too much out there too often. Seldom is my regret in this area more than just an annoyance. But recently, I took something that I had been hiding for a very long time and ‘laid it all out there’. I confided things I shouldn’t have to people I shouldn’t have and while God was still able to use bad for good, I was very awakened by the chaos I created for myself.

I have learned since then, that sometimes the enemy makes us feel like frauds simply through us using discretion. He is a sly and slimy devil, so why we are constantly shocked that he broke through our defences never ceases to amaze me. I am shocked by it all the time.

It’s not that God doesn’t want us to be true in our life experiences but there is a time and place for everything. My almost filter less mind, verbalize through my big mouth, sometimes gets me into trouble but I am learning to handle myself much more intentionally. It’s not just about letting it rip as much as letting it light. If it is not sharing the light of Jesus, we really need to use caution in whom we confide in.

I am extremely grateful to have such great people surrounding me that I can fellowship with and celebrate life with. I am even more grateful to have just a couple people that I can truly confide in. I know what I tell them is not only safe but that they will be honest with me when I seek council.

This is such a blessing and I am so glad to know that being discreet is not the same thing as being dishonest. One thing we can count in is that God already knows everything and no matter what we have to say, He is ALWAYS the right answer.

Don’t ever let the enemy consume you and when you are standing there in shock that he broke through, look up and ask God to refresh your spiritual GPS and just get right back on track.

Thought for the day

In All My Life...:

This is my sweet friend. She has been through more in her life than most adults. She has bravely chosen to put her thoughts into a blog. So very proud of her and know you will be too. Follow her to be inspired or to pray for her as she continues to glorify Him in her life!

Praying for protection over her and for strength to hold on.

I love you my little sister in Christ!!! You are amazing!
<3 Angie

Originally posted on godchangeditall:

I find it quite amazing how God uses the things that humans mean for evil in great ways. He always finds a way to make good come from a tough situation. For instance because I was abused as a child and suffered through anorexia , I came to know God. Is it the way that I would have chosen for me to learn of him, Absolutely not, but although it isn’t what i would have chosen I know that it was a part of Gods perfect plan for my life. I haven’t found my purpose in life yet, but i do know that i wasn’t fighting those battles alone. Even when I was laying in bed afraid to go asleep at night, and I had never even heard of God, he was there with me. He has a purpose for me that will use those experiences to benefit his plan…

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We All Have It

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We do not have to love everything about someone to be loving toward them. In actuality, God loves us even though He does not love our sins. When He tells us to love, He means as He loves.

He doesn’t love us out of pity or because no one else will. He loves us because even if we don’t know what it is, there is value in each person.

We don’t have to point out the things we don’t love about someone to fully acknowledge the things we do. We really do not need to say, “Despite these things, I still love you.” All that is, is deceiving ourselves into thinking that we have the right to do anything but that.

There is value in every breath God breathes in us all. Instead of having the mindset of an ‘overcomer’ or hero over those who hurt us, we can choose to love the positive values in them.

It’s not that we are denying that they have sin, because we all do. And it doesn’t mean that we will not find more appealing things in some people than others.

The point is… To be loving, all it takes is to see that every person has value. It’s not up to us to decide how much. It is only up to us to act on the fact that there is.

The Seeker

I seek you out as my lungs seek breath; as a ship seeks the waters.

How the moon seeks to pierce darkness; this is how I search for you.

As I peer at the stars, I beg for your forgiveness and long for you to rescue me.

I can feel hot tears searing my cheeks as I fight the confusion. Free me.

I seek you every second of every day.

Live Intentionally

Some days when the stresses of life catch up with us, we forget to sing our life song intentionally.

Don’t allow life to live you… Instead, grab ahold of it, embrace every second and whisper to your Creator, “I live, for the greatness of the life you have given me will NOT go unacknowledged.” Live intentionally and love genuinely.

“It is not the heart beating in itself that makes it special, it’s what song it is beating in tune with that makes it a melody.” ~Angie

Love to you all!

I Would Die

Wash my hands dear God,
Let them be clean.
Pump my heart dear Lord,
Let it remain full.
Clear my mind sweet Father,
So I can think again.
Lift my soul faithful King,
That I may survive.
Close my mouth Great I Am,
That I not trap myself.
Guide my feet Alpha and Omega,
That I will not stumble.
Wipe my eyes loving Jesus,
That I may always ‘see’.
Protect me my Shield,
So I can endure this life.
Raise up my courage oh Sword,
That I can fight with honor.
Rescue me precious Savior,
That I will reveal Your glory.
Move through me powerful Spirit,
So I can feel truly alive.

Every day something happens that requires me to consider my actions. From eating right to handling serious issues. Some days they are bigger than others but it is still the way of it. Some days I simply just allow my heart to be moved when it actually should be shielded. I allow my mind to chase anger. These things get mixed in with good things and they are easy to overlook but they exist. It’s not something that I think about a lot until I get to trust. I am terrible when it comes to trusting or even knowing if I am supposed to trust at all. I mean, maybe God intends for me to be on guard forever in this area. I don’t know. All I know is that I can trust Him. He never plays games with my heart. I never wonder if He loves me or if He will protect me. I only catch myself asking why but even that is cleared in His word.

I remember one day, looking at the ocean and thinking, I could walk in there and disappear and family aside, I would be missed by so few. Sure, I’m involved in tons of stuff so the shock would be widely felt, I’m sure, but not because of genuine relationships. Not because I have drank wine or broke bread with all these people. The grief would pass quickly. It wasn’t a suicidal thought or anything. I didn’t actually consider walking into the Ocean or anything and I don’t need reassurance or anything so don’t panic. LOL It was just a moment of self life evaluation.

I revisited this evaluation today and thought to myself. “Who would I be willing to die for?” For real. Not a quick, save that child from the moving car kind of giving where goodness and urgency collide, but real, contemplated I would sit and breathe my life out so that you could breathe your life in kind of willingness. To die for one is to create loss and grief for the others you would also be willing to die for.  When you look at it that way, the relationships we have become so much more important, do they not?

I am much more deliberate when I choose who can have that kind of access to my heart these days. I have embraced and trusted that God will be my mediator in life, ensuring that I do not recklessly interfere with His plan. His love for me will sustain me through all my follies. I can trust Him through anything. Sometimes He will use people for that purpose.

What I have considered today is how Jesus knew He was going to die. He knew He was going to be tortured and consciously made the decision to breathe His life out in exchange for ours… Including those who murdered him. I know how much I love my list of people whom I would be willing to die for. Can you imagine how great His love must be?

Save me from myself dear God. Don’t let me get in the way of Your glory. I love You, God and I know You hear my heart and see what I sacrifice to be honorable despite my temporary failures. But let no one ever forget Your sacrifice and how it is magnified by billions to my small ones. Let me not boast of anything but give You all the praise, because without You, I would just be dead. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen

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